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  • Writer's pictureSmart Surrogacy

Navigating Your First Meeting: Tips for Surrogates and Intended Parents

Updated: Jul 27, 2023

Once the surrogacy match is made, the first face-to-face meeting between surrogates and intended parents can be an exciting yet nerve-wracking experience. This meeting is an essential step in building a strong and trusting relationship, and we're here to offer some helpful tips to make the most of it.

Expect Pre-Meeting Nerves:

It's entirely normal to feel a mix of excitement and nervousness before the first video call. Remember, both surrogates and intended parents are likely feeling the same way. Embrace these emotions, and know that Smart Surrogacy's thorough matching process ensures compatibility.

Prepare Ahead of the Call:

Take time to review each other's profiles and come prepared with questions and topics you'd like to discuss. Consider what you hope to learn about your potential match and what you'd like to share about yourself. Preparing beforehand will make the conversation more meaningful.

Be Curious and Willing to Share:

This is your chance to learn about each other's stories and personalities. Ask questions about each other's backgrounds, hobbies, family, and interests. Share your own experiences and aspirations openly. This first video call can be the start of a meaningful and rewarding relationship.

Avoid Giving a List of Requirements:

While discussing general lifestyle questions is encouraged, avoid giving specific instructions. Surrogates rely on expert medical guidance, and intended parents should trust their surrogate's medical professionals. Letting go of control is crucial for a successful journey and helps build trust from the start.

Discuss Communication Expectations:

Communication is key in any relationship, and it's no different in surrogacy. Discuss your hopes for frequency and form of communication, such as video calls, phone calls, texts, or in-person visits. Agreeing on communication expectations early on helps set a positive tone.

Avoid Talking About Money:

Financial matters are best discussed during contract negotiations, not during the initial meeting. Focus on getting to know each other, building a strong foundation for your relationship.

Remember You're Both Getting to Know Each Other:

Approach the meeting as friends getting to know each other, not as an interrogation. Share your stories and what led you to surrogacy or intended parenthood. This intimacy will help establish a strong connection.

Stay Calm and Be Yourself:

It's natural to feel nervous, but take deep breaths and remember that both parties are likely feeling the same way. Keep the conversation casual and let it flow organically. Being yourself will lead to a more genuine connection.

Express Your Feelings:

Don't be afraid to express your nerves or excitement at the beginning of the call. Acknowledging these emotions will help ease tension and make the conversation more comfortable.

Remember, this meeting is just the beginning of a remarkable journey. Be open, honest, and genuine in your interactions. Should you decide to move forward together, your relationship will continue to grow and flourish as you embark on this monumental journey.

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